Since I was born, I was raised to be a Christian. I’ve been a Christian for all my 24 years. In that span of time, I have left the bubble of my family life and went off to college, where I was surrounded by those who didn’t have faith. I was challenged for my beliefs, and I even doubted them sometimes. It forced me to take a step away from simply believing something because I was raised to, and I had to take an honest look at my faith and the world around me. As I watch American society today, I have come to a startling conclusion:

I cannot stand “organized religion” anymore. In fact, I hate it. “Organized religion”, in my opinion, is why society is in the toilet. I think the world needs to be rid of “organized religion”.

No doubt some of you who know me personally are shocked at that statement. Allow me to clarify: I think we need to rid the world of the term “organized religion”.

When somebody uses the phrase “organized religion”, and normally I mean celebrities like Brad Pitt and Alec Baldwin, they are being derogative. They are putting your faith down. It’s an insult. Think about this: anytime somebody publicly alludes to the idea that they believe homosexuality is wrong, the media explodes. CNN is full of headlines with exclamation points (and boy, is that channel a joke!), and the world turns them into an outcast. But people regularly go on television and into interviews and puts down entire belief systems, and nobody says a word. They hide behind the publicly acceptable, politically correct phrase, “organized religion”.

I hate it. Look, this is a free country, and I am allowed to be a smart, well-read, Lutheran man. I respect everyone’s right to have their own faith. So why don’t people respect mine? Why can celebrities go on the air and basically say that Christians are idiots, and everybody just lets it go?

No doubt some of you are wondering what this rant has to do with The Practical Nerd in general. Well, I say a Practical Nerd believes in something. A Practical Nerd has faith and stands up for it. If you want to improve your life, take a good, hard look at your belief system and defend it until you are blue in the face. Don’t hide behind the “What’s right for you is fine, what’s right for me is fine” argument, because it inherently says, “Hey, we’re all wrong!”

I’ve written about how I think “open-mindedness” in its current form is crippling American society. I had a subscriber to The Practical Nerd Rules for Life unsubscribe over it – they said it proved how “closed-minded” I am. My reaction: so? Why is that a bad thing? I have beliefs, and I stand by them. What good is your faith if you just roll over and default to whoever’s around you?

We live in a fantastic country. There was a time in this world when just speaking out for your faith was an instant death sentence, and I don’t mean lethal injection. I’m talking about being bludgeoned with rocks until you’re dead, getting tied to a scrap of wood and lit on fire alive, and yes, crucifixion – getting nailed to a piece of wood and left for dead. Today, you can’t do any of that stuff. The worst thing you can get is somebody yelling at you or rolling their eyes. So what are you afraid of?

There’s a difference between being “tolerant” and “accepting” other people’s beliefs. “Tolerant” means you understand that they are there. I understand that there are plenty of people who believe differently than I do, and I can’t/won’t force them into believing what I do. But “accepting” their beliefs means you think it’s okay, which is not. I don’t think it’s okay at all. My beliefs are exclusive of their beliefs, and vice-versa. That means, by believing what I believe, I think they are wrong.

That doesn’t mean that I have to preach to them at every waking moment, or disassociate myself with them. I don’t look down on them or treat them differently. I’m talking about a very important mindset and attitude.

So what do you do, as an aspiring Practical Nerd?

First, you don’t ditch out on your faith because Bill Maher thinks it’s stupid. Celebrities already sway our political vote despite being wildly unqualified. They already show us what to wear and how to act. They teach us to leave this country and adopt kids from other countries. Don’t let them take away our faith.

Second, you do not insult somebody for their beliefs, nor do you treat them differently because of them. Even if you don’t believe in what the Bible says, take a look once at what Jesus did while he was around. He hung out with tax collectors and prostitutes and treated them with respect. He didn’t tell them he thought they were okay. In fact, he flat-out told them they were sinning. But in the face of society, who had treated these people as awful outcasts, he dined with them and befriended them. You do the same. If the differences in faith come up in conversation, have a respectful, calm exchange of ideas. Intelligent discussion is a beautiful thing when done respectfully.

Third, take a good, hard look at your faith. I stand before you today a Lutheran, just as I always have been. But that doesn’t mean I blindly follow it. I continue to educate myself in the faith and take an analytical look at Lutheranism, Christianity, and the world today.

Finally, take a stand. Develop a backbone. Be confident in what you believe in. Regardless of society’s attempts to undermine its importance, your faith makes you who you are. It is the moral compass that drives your actions. It is your foundation. Build on it. Don’t just stand up for it when it is convenient. Defend it against opposition.

Yeah, yeah, it’s not popular. It’s not cool. It’s not what society wants you to do today. But why are we listening to so many people whose sole intents in life are to entertain us and drive up ratings and movie revenue? Get some substance to your life, and remove the term “organized religion” from your vocabulary.

For those who don’t know me personally, I am a freelance writer. I’ve done copywriting for several years now, and I decided, earlier this year, to take the plunge into becoming a full-on marketing firm. As I putzed around for a year, completely in over my head, I manage to get a project here and there. Then it dawns on me: social media marketing.

Blogging. Twitter. Facebook. Everything is going social these days, including marketing. This was a slam dunk! I even managed to get Erik Chopin from season 3 of The Biggest Loser to sign on. This was going to be great!

Uh… wait.

After getting into it for a few months, I realized something: social media can’t be done by a marketing firm. Sure, they can put together campaigns. They can develop iPhone apps and YouTube videos. But the execution and the engagement has to be done by the company. So, as I pull away from the social media marketing flop, here’s a few lessons I’ve learned that we can all use in our real-world relationships.

Don’t be somebody you’re not.

I’m not Erik Chopin. I didn’t lose hundreds of pounds on national television. I’m not a no-B.S. guy from New York City. I’m Tom Meitner, a skinny guy who’s never been on TV and who hails from Milwaukee. The people are going to go to Erik’s website to see Erik, not me.

Are you pretending to be somebody you’re not? I’m a fairly quirky guy, and my friends just have to accept that about me. I don’t try to hide the fact that:

• I think everybody should like the same television shows that I like.
• I’m a Christian man.
• I sometimes eat bread and ketchup as a snack, to the disgust of pretty much everyone.

But that’s me. People accept it. Be true to who you are. Don’t be a ghostwriter for yourself.

Engage people in conversation.

Sometimes, when I’m on the phone with my fiancé, if I’m tired or distracted, she winds up getting the “uh-huh” and “mm-hmm” from me. It becomes clear I’m not paying attention, and she gets mad at me. And for good reason. Social media is a two-way conversation as well. The best bloggers out there respond to emails and comments. They get the most loyalty from readers.

Be a part of the conversation you are in. Don’t just be polite and half-listen. And don’t just talk to people either; ask them about their lives and how their day is going. I guarantee you, it will breed a much stronger relationship. Be pleasant to talk to.

Mix it up.

The people who market the best with social media are involved in different areas: they blog with video, they do audio podcasts, they write, they post pictures. They have different methods of reaching out and interacting with their audiences.

Look closely at your friendships: do they just revolve around going to the bars? Do you only interact with them at work? Do you only approach them when you have nothing else to do? A friendship is based on shared experiences of all kinds: go see a concert or a movie together. Stay in and hang out (is that an oxymoron?). Take a short trip together. Build experiences with people, and they will respond in kind.

Make the other person feel important.

The best blogging tip out there is to write for the audience, not for yourself. Which means, base your posts on what they need to hear, not what you want to say. It makes the reader feel like they are important.

Call up a friend to just say “hi”. Buy or make them a gift. Do a nice gesture for them. That’s how you show true friendship.

Don’t do it for your own personal gain.

Social media is to be used for your passion. It is to be done to connect with your audience. After that, if you want to make money, there are ways to do it. But if you head into it with money being the sole motivation, you will fail. Just like I did.

Don’t just be friends with a coworker to get ahead. Don’t just hang out with the guy that always buys the drinks. Spend time with people you care about; don’t patronize people just to get stuff you want.

I’m sure there are other lessons – can you think of any? Share them in the comments!

Photo courtesy of bixentro.

Most people choose unhappiness over uncertainty. – Timothy Ferriss

The usual route of life, according to society:

1. Be born.
2. Go to 18 years of school.
3. Go to college for 4-5 years.
4. Get married.
5. Get an entry-level job working for some company in your field of study. If you can’t, go back to graduate school for 2 years and then get a job.
6. Have some kids.
7. Work 8 hours per day, generally from 9am to 5pm, from Monday until Friday of every week.
8. Take a week or two of vacation every year.
9. Fight to convince your boss to give you more money.
10. Complain about your job to your friends.
11. Retire at 65.
12. Die.

It’s safe, it’s predictable, and it’s what American society wants us – nay, expects us – to do with our lives. If you do anything different from this, people will surround you with concerned looks and comments about “throwing your future away”. I frequently mentioned during my last three years of college that I wanted to drop out and didn’t see the point to it, but anyone from family to friends would start saying that I would “never be able to get a job” and I would “regret it for the rest of my life”.

The bulk of American society buys into “deferred happiness”: the idea that you need to work hard now to be happy later. When you are in school, it means working hard so that you can get a well-paying job later. When you get that job, it means working hard so that you can retire with money and be happy later. But what if you want to be happy NOW?

I want to set the record straight before I go any further: I wholeheartedly believe in the value of hard work. Everyone needs to go through it, and it is crucial in the development of your work ethic and attitude throughout your life. Everyone needs to make sacrifices. I just worry that we’re sacrificing our entire lives sometimes.

Nobody knows this better than Tim Ferriss. Two years ago, Tim released a book called The 4-Hour Work Week. In it, he recommends finding a way to “outsource your life” – in other words, get other people to take care of menial tasks for you. There are people all over the internet who have jumped on top of him for saying that he’s “lazy” and that he promotes the idea of people sitting around drinking fruity drinks with umbrellas in them. The problem is, they just looked at his methodology, and not the philosophy behind it. They miss the entire chapter on giving back: finding a cause that you believe in and are interested in and devoting time to that. He feels, and I agree, that being happy and being a productive member of society are not mutually exclusive.

So, he set himself up a way to experience the world, be happy, and help other people out along the way. That sounds like a pretty happy life to me. If you want to read more from Tim Ferriss, check out his blog here.

So how does that fit in to what we are talking about? Tim took risks. He didn’t sit in a cubicle wishing life was different. He made it different for himself, and he’s been able to design a lifestyle that makes him happy.

This does not mean I want you all to go and quit your jobs today, especially if you have a family relying on you. In that case, it’s important to take a gradual approach to this sort of thing, and make little changes along the way that can add up – like start a little side job in something that interests you and see what kind of opportunities there are. Who knows? With a little luck and some work, you might be able to put something together that could even replace your full-time job down the line. It happens.

Or, my favorite, don’t be afraid to cut some things out of your life, too. People pay for luxuries that they are certain they can’t live without, but they wind up causing them more stress than they are worth sometimes. How many years went by where we all had to program VCRs to tape stuff, or had to wait until a commercial break to go use the bathroom? Now you talk about how you can’t live without your DVR but you sigh and moan when the bill comes at the end of the month. What sense does that make? Are you really happy there? Learn to live without, and you might open the door to happiness you never knew existed. It’s possible to take risks responsibly – you just need to find the opportunities in your life.

In my case, I finished up college, but I was a full-time freelance writer two months before I even got my diploma. I waited and worked on the side until I found enough of a market to take the plunge. But it’s a year later, and it’s still going fairly strong. My diploma hangs in my guest room, and it just looks useless to me. Outside of a firm faith in God, I have no clue how the rest of my year is going to go. I am completely uncertain.

But you know what? I’ve never been happier.

One of the biggest things I hear from people is “I could never do that” or other self-defeating attitudes similar to that. These things really bother me. If you have an attitude like that towards something, you haven’t even given yourself a chance. This world is full of missed opportunities because Cooler People don’t want to go against the grain or test their own limits. This article uses a few inspirational stories to get that point across, and to illustrate that your personal financial situation can change too, but you need to be positive that you can do it.

It all begins in your mind. If you continually allow negative thoughts and a poor attitude to dictate your life, you will stay imprisoned in a life of defeat and failure. However, if you see yourself achieving wealth, becoming successful, and being closer to God, nothing can keep you from reaching your goals.

A great article from a great site. Check it out here.